Serving Michigan Families
|
| FEATURED VENDOR Charlotte, Michigan Officiants Directory at Decidio.com |
| Home | Sample Ceremony | Reserve Your Date | FAQs | Articles of Interest | Links |
Officiant: Family, friends, honored guests and loved ones, welcome to the blending of two hearts and two lives into one beautiful whole. [Bride] and [Groom] have long planned and anticipated this event and they will remember this day, and your supportive presence here, for the rest of their lives. They have expressed their love to each other every day for many months in private, but today is special because today they will express and vow their love for each other in front of you. Without you, this moment would not exist and we are all grateful to you for gracing us with your presence.
We also recognize, give thanks and welcome the presence of God, Goddess and all the spirits of Peace and Love who have chosen to bless this couple with their protection this day and every day. Without the life that flows to and through us from the Divine Source, we would not be able to experience this wedding, today's fellowship or any of the other blessings bestowed upon us in this world. We are grateful for and humbled by the gifts of life and love that we celebrate here today.
[Bride] and [Groom], you have waited for this moment, planned for this moment and worked towards this moment for a long time. Now I ask that you simply be in this moment. I’m going to be silent while you, while all of us, stop thinking about where we are going to be in the future and simply celebrate where we are right now. This is the moment you planned for [Groom], [Bride], everyone. Take a few deep breaths right now and enjoy your wedding!
(Moment of silence and smiles)
Officiant: [Groom], you did not come to be here without the love and support of others. You were born into this world naked and helpless, as we all were, and you were nurtured and protected as you grew into the strong and capable man you now are. Who so loved the boy that he, in time, became this man?
Family of the Groom: We did and we do.
Officiant: Are you now willing to both release your son that he may join with the woman by his side and embrace her as your daughter?
Family of the Groom: We are.
Groom: Thank you for your love, your support and your blessings on my union with [Bride] whom I love.
Bride: Thank you for your love, your support and your gift of [Groom] whom I love.
Officiant: [Bride], you did not come to be here without the love and support of others. You were born into this world naked and helpless, as we all were, and you were nurtured and protected as you grew into the strong and capable woman you now are. Who so loved the girl that she, in time, became this woman?
Family of the Bride: We did and we do.
Officiant: Are you now willing to both release your daughter that she may join with the man by her side and embrace him as your son?
Family of the Groom: We are.
Bride: Thank you for your love, your support and your blessings on my union with [Groom] whom I love.
Groom: Thank you for your love, your support and your gift of [Bride] whom I love.
(Optional readings, songs or comments on the nature of love and marriage)
(Vows of love and commitment either recited, read from cards or read by Officiant and responded to with "I do")
Officiant: May I have the rings that [Groom] and [Bride] have chosen to exchange with each other?
The wedding ring is a complete and perfect circle with no end and no beginning. It is the symbol of both the creation we are all a part of and of your love and commitment to each other. The giving and receiving of these rings will bind you both to the vows you have made.
(In Prayer) Heavenly Father, Creator of All, thank you for blessing these rings. May they serve to always remind [Bride] and [Groom] of the promises they have made to each other today. May your endless love and boundless wisdom surround these rings, these two young lovers before me and all of those gathered to witness this exchange today. In your name, we pray. Amen.
Groom: [Bride], please accept this ring as an everlasting symbol of my eternal vows,. I offer it with all that I am, all that I have and all that I will ever be. May I love you, honor you and respect you, for as long as we both shall live.
(Groom places ring on Bride’s finger)
Bride: [Groom], please accept this ring as an everlasting symbol of my eternal vows,. I offer it with all that I am, all that I have and all that I will ever be. May I love you, honor you and respect you, for as long as we both shall live.
(Bride places ring on Groom’s finger)
Officiant: You have each received the blessings of your families. You have vowed to love each other. You have offered and accepted rings to wear as a symbol of those vows. And you have done this all in the presence and company of your dearest friends and most beloved family. It is now my most humble honor to declare to you and all those assembled here that you are now, legally and spiritually, husband and wife.
You may enjoy the first kiss of your long and fruitful marriage.
Ladies and Gentlemen, please congratulate Mr. and Mrs. _______ (or however the couple wishes to be addressed)
~*~ ~*~ ~*~
Ceremony Order and Options
Every wedding ceremony is different, but this is a general overview of my more commonly requested ceremony options.
Offered here in the order most often used, however I’ve been known to mix things up when it made sense to do so, so remember that this isn't the “best way” to order a wedding ceremony, it’s merely one of many good ways.
~*~ ~*~ ~*~
* indicates an opportunity to choose or change the music, to enhance the mood.
*Greeting and Seating of your guests
The most elegant and intricately planned weddings are nothing without guests to witness the event. I will specially train your ushers in the vital areas of Smiling, Greeting and Escorting your friends and family to their seats. It has been my experience that the idea of seating people on the "Bride's side" or the "Groom's side" of the church serves only to suggest a division between the families, so I train ushers to seat people where they are most comfortable instead.
*Seating of your VIPs
Grandparents, parents and other important people are frequently escorted in by ushers and seated formally in the front of the venue as the "opening scene" of a wedding production. The Bride's mother is traditionally the last person seated before the wedding begins.
Entrance of Officiant
(with or without Groom)Depending upon the layout of the venue, the Officiant usually enters either near the "altar" or down the aisle. Most Grooms want to enter with me, but several modern couples choose to enter an process down the aisle together. Either way...
*Procession of the Bridal Party
Either as couples or individually, groomsmen and bridesmaids s-l-o-o-o-w-l-y glide down the aisle, smiling and proud, allowing plenty of time for radiant photos to be taken. They then take their assigned places at the front of the venue. Groomsmen are encouraged to greet and shake the Groom's hand before moving into place as a formal declaration of their support.
*The Bride's Entrance
Escorted by her special someone, the Bride is revealed in her wedding glory to the delight of her guests, and her Groom. Special touches here include having guests seated on the aisle offer long stemmed red roses to the Bride as she enters. The roses either form or are held with the Bridal bouquet and are then used later in the service as mementos. Modern couples frequently have the Groom walk up the aisle to meet the Bride and her Father. The two men exchange words or a hug before the Bride and Groom complete the walk to the altar area together. This symbolizes the Bride's childhood journey with her parents, followed by her own journey with the man she has chosen to give herself to.
Welcome and Centering
I welcome your guests, perhaps introduce your bridal party, share some of your unique love story and/or offer a word of prayer. Then, I ask the Bride and Groom to face each other and spend a minute silently focusing on where they are at this moment in time. Too often, wedding preparations are hectic and "behind the scenes" worries follow the couple right up the aisle, through the entire wedding and by the time we remember to take a deep breath and relax, the day is over. Adding a "centering" moment to your wedding helps you to enjoy yourselves and be emotionally present during the ceremony.
Declaration of Intent
Designed to inform guests, officiant and each other that they are ready, able and willing, the Declaration of Intent takes the form of one or more questions directed toward the Bride and Groom. It can be as simple or complicated as you like, but most couples lean toward simple questions followed with "I Do's.
This is also the part where the traditional "Speak now or forever hold your Peace" speech goes, but I don't get much call for that. It's not legally required and it tends to invite would-be comedians to spoil an otherwise beautiful moment.
Instead I prefer to have your guests rise and ask them a question or three about their willingness to support you in your marriage and have them respond with "We will". It includes them in the action and gives everyone a part to play in the service.
Reading or Solo #1 (optional)
Religious or poetic readings on love and/or love songs offer your guests an opportunity to participate in your wedding ceremony. Short and sweet is better than long and involved, but if it's a choice between long and meaningful or short and meaningless, I'd say go with the meaningful.
*Acts of Memorial (optional)
If one or more special people will be unable to attend your wedding, consider adding a tribute to them here. It can take the form of acknowledging an empty chair, placing a rose in front of a photograph or whatever you feel is appropriate. If an act of Memorial is something you would like to include, we can discuss several ideas when planning your ceremony.
Making your Wedding Vows
The exchange of wedding vows is the legally required element in your ceremony. They can be as simple and traditional as "Do you take this person to be your lawfully wedded husband/ wife?" (though I'm not a big fan of these vows, they tend to sound like "awfully wedded" far too often for my taste...) or as elaborate and unique as custom written love songs or poetry.
How and what you choose to vow to each other is a matter of personal preference. I have many styles of vows available to choose from if you'd rather not write your own, but creativity is always more than welcome. You're also welcome to memorize your vows, but "crib sheets" are welcomed and I can have you "repeat after me" if you'd prefer it.
*Unity Ceremony (optional)
The most common unity ceremony is the lighting of the Unity Candle, but there are several to choose from including:
Handfasting
I can perform a "traditional" handfasting rite in place of much of the wedding wording with this ritual as the centerpiece, or I can add the symbolism of a handfasting into an otherwise modern wedding. However you would like.
Handfasting rituals vary some in wording, but the basic image is that of a Bride and Groom's hands being gently wrapped with ribbons or cords that represent the bonds of love. This tradition is the source of the phrase "tying the knot", though securing the bonds with a "lover's knot" is not always desired.
Roses have been used to convey feelings of love for centuries. Many wedding ceremonies incorporate this symbology in various ways. Often the Bride and/or Groom will present a rose to their mothers as a way of honoring them. Sometimes roses are used to represent family or friends who are unable to attend the ceremony, especially those who have passed on recently. Roses can be used in all sorts of ways, but the "Rose Ceremony" described here uses them as the first gift exchanged between a husband and a wife. I've written an adaptation of a "traditional" script for this ceremony and it can be found here.
Two taper candles are used to represent the bride and groom as individuals and a pillar candle is used to represent the entity they create together the "marriage".
This ceremony holds the same significance as the Unity Candle ceremony, but it is better suited to outdoor weddings on windy days and weddings of parents who want to include their children in the "unity act".
Sand is used to represent the Bride and Groom and anyone else participating. Many couples like to represent God or Spirituality or Love as well. Each person (with the officiant standing in for God) holds a small container of sand that represents them, then all participants pour their sand into a larger container that is used to represent the combined family.
Another blending ritual, this one with wine instead of sand. It is rumored that this tradition began in France whenever the children of two vineyard owners married.
Again, the Bride and Groom are represented by separate containers, this time they are small decanters of wine. Traditionally, the Bride is symbolized by white wine and the Groom with red, though many couples choose wines based on their individual wine preferences and not on color or tradition. Each pours their wine into a single glass and then both drink from it. This represents both the blending and the accepting of each other.
This ceremony is a little different from the others above. It has less of a unity/ blending meaning and more of a love and acceptance meaning. It can be extremely powerful and, due to its relative rarity, it has the potential of bringing tears to the eyes of guests who haven't seen it before.
Again, of course there are many variations, but they are pretty much all reflected in the script used for the ceremony. It asks that the Bride hold the Grooms hands in hers then the officiant describes his hands as they will support her throughout their marriage. She then blesses each of his palms with a kiss, before he takes her hands in his and the officiant describes her hands to him in a similar way. A sample script is here.
Roses for Mothers and Others (optional)
The opportunity to offer your mother-in-law a rose in thanks for their gift of their son or daughter's hand in marriage is too good to pass up. It makes for warm feelings, lifetime memories and beautiful photos. While some think it dilutes the beauty of the Rose Ceremony mentioned above, I think it can be very moving, especially if the rose is offered with a heart-felt "I love you".
The Ring Exchange and Vows
I tend to ask for the rings, say a little bit about the symbology, both as a never-ending circle and as a precious metal, bless them (if desired), then return them to you and coach you in a "repeat after me" vow exchange.
Couples choosing to have very small weddings will sometimes request a Ring Warming after the symbology talk and before the blessing. Larger weddings have a more difficult time pulling off a ring warming without losing the emotional intensity of the ceremony, but in an intimate setting, it can enhance the magic.
*Ring Warming (optional)
The wedding rings are secured together with a ribbon or in a small bag and passed to each guest in turn. The guest with the rings gets the opportunity to offer a prayer, blessing or wish for the wedding couple, either silently or aloud. In this manner the rings are "warmed" with good thoughts before being returned to the officiant and either blessed or simply handed to the Bride and Groom to exchange with each other.
Reading or Solo #2 (optional)
As above.
Family Vows (optional)
When weddings don't create a couple, but a brand-new family with children, family vows are often in order. Often coupled with an exchange of jewelry as a token of the promises to support and protect children who are related to you, not by blood, but by love.
Pronouncement
By the power vested in me... actually, I almost never say that... I declare that it is my great and humble honor to pronounce couples "husband" and "wife".
Prayer (optional)
In whatever tradition you prefer, or none at all.
The Kiss
Self explanatory...
Introduction
I will introduce you to your guests as "Mr. and Mrs." or however you prefer.
*Triumphant Exit
At this point, your guests can either be seated or on their feet. Depending on logistics of the venue and your preferences, we can let them stay seated or I can ask them to rise to their feet to celebrate with you!
For added fun, sometimes it's possible to encourage guests to line the aisle so you can exit the venue in the midst of the applause. If small bottles of bubbles are provided to your guests, you can take your first walk together as a married couple surrounded by bubbles. (You could choose to provide confetti, birdseed, rice, live butterflies, balloons or any number of items to exit through, but bubbles require less cleanup...).
| Home | Sample Ceremony | Reserve Your Date | FAQs | Articles of Interest | Links |
~*~ ~*~ ~*~
To assure that you'll have the wedding you want, one that photographs beautifully and makes a lasting impression on your guests, be sure to reserve your date as soon as possible!
The ceremony outline offered above is only a suggestion.
Each of my ceremonies is written to the specifications of the couple I'm working with.I want to thank Chicago Officiant, Thomas Witham, for inspiring me to include the bubbles and the roses for mothers. Brilliant!
~*~ ~*~ ~*~
|
