Wedding Officiant Myths

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Why does it cost so much money for "30 minutes of work"?

From the point of view of a ceremony guest, it may look as if a wedding officiant is providing merely a half an hour of service to the family. Such people will occasionally ask why it should cost a whole day's pay for a few minutes service.

Of course, the reality is much more complex and well more than 30 minutes of work goes into the design, writing, rehearsing and performing of a modern wedding ceremony.

Please consider the time, work and expense involved in:

• In-person consultations
• Emails and phone calls
• Finalizing ceremony wording, vows, readings and musical choices
• Coordinating schedules of the participants, for consultations and rehearsals
• Research for particular ceremony options (both research done currently and that performed over the years of education and training)
• Ceremony preparation, proof-reading, private read-throughs, updating, revisions, submitting for editing, last minute changes and eliciting the final approval
• Child care for my young ones left at home during rehearsals and ceremonies
• Travel time and time spent waiting before rehearsals
• The rehearsal itself
• Travel time and time spent waiting before the ceremony
• Calming nervous participants before the ceremony
• Greeting guests before the ceremony
• The ceremony itself (those ubiquitous 30 minutes)
• Being available to participants and guests following the ceremony
• Writing contracts and filing legal and personal paperwork

~ then of course there's the time lost with our own significant others on weekends, when family and friends tend to be home

Remember:

You can always have a wedding without the dresses, the tuxedos, the flowers, the rings, the food and music, but...

You can't have a ceremony without an Officiant.

If you want a legal wedding, it's one of the only items you DO need. It doesn't have to be me, but it does need to be someone.

Choose someone you can trust and be comfortable with no matter how much you need to pay for their services. It's an investment you won't regret.

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Wedding Planning books (or web site) state that wedding officiants need only be paid an "honorarium" of around $30-50.

The wedding planning books are right - if your officiant is a clergyperson who serves you because you are a member of their church, temple or other house of worship. In that case, you pay their salary through your weekly donations and wedding services are part of the job.

Independent Wedding officiants (like myself) do not receive a salary from a church, so our fees need to be higher, not only to compensate us for our time, but also to reimburse us for our marketing efforts (so couples like you can find us) and to pay for the incidentals that we don't get from a church; housing, insurance, internet service, ceremonial clothing, postage, books, phone service, continuing education, printer ink, etc.

Also, consider the fact that most officiants who only require a small honorarium will be reading the same ceremony they read for everyone. They will not even consider customizing or re-designing their standard wedding ceremony to reflect your personal beliefs or interests. Customizing anything, be it your dress, your car or your ceremony is going to cost more.

Another difference between standard clergy and an independent wedding officiant is travel expenses. While many ministers can walk to their churches, perform a wedding and walk home all within an hour, most independent officiants need to maintain a vehicle in order to make themselves available to couples at various venues in their service area. The other consideration is that, while I'm driving to and from your venue, I'm unable to perform ceremonies for other couples.

Last, many independent wedding officiants write and perform weddings as their only source of income and, due to the nature of the wedding business, are only able to serve in 2 or 3 weddings a week during the wedding season and often none at all during the slow seasons. There's simply no way to pay the bills and keep yourself available to couples who want your services for $90-150 a week or about $4000-7500 a year.

Even if we wanted to perform weddings for that little, we simply couldn't afford to.

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Wedding officiants must be invited to the reception as a matter of etiquette.